


one mississippi you're here (loving me with your whole heart)

by i_own_your_wifi



Category: Mean Girls (2004), Mean Girls - Richmond/Benjamin/Fey
Genre: F/F, Friends With Benefits With Feelings, Post-Canon, an apology arc has already happened, janis is confused, regina is confusing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:21:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22688395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_own_your_wifi/pseuds/i_own_your_wifi
Summary: Janis doesn’t really understand Regina. One minute, Regina’s kissing her softly in her bed, the next she’s screaming at her to get out. Janis knows she doesn’t deserve that. She doesn’t deserve someone who would only love her half the time. But when her phone pings with a text from Regina, she’s grabbing her coat and driving to Regina’s apartment across town.based off one mississippi by zara larsson
Relationships: Regina George/Janis Ian, Regina George/Janis Sarkisian
Comments: 4
Kudos: 72





	one mississippi you're here (loving me with your whole heart)

**Author's Note:**

> This is a multi chapter fic, but I can't guarantee I'll update regularly

Janis doesn’t really understand Regina. One minute, Regina’s kissing her softly in her bed, the next she’s screaming at her to get out. Janis knows she doesn’t deserve that. She doesn’t deserve someone who would only love her half the time. But when her phone pings with a text from Regina, she’s grabbing her coat and driving to Regina’s apartment across town.

Janis never knows what to expect when she sees Regina. All the possibilities of what Regina will do run through her mind as she walks up the stairs to Regina’s apartment. Janis hesitates at the door, fist raised to knock. She considers going home, leaving Regina to sort out her own problems. That thought is gone as quickly as it came, and Janis is knocking. Regina opens the door and tugs Janis inside. She pushed Janis against the door and kisses her, pulling at her clothes. Janis knows she should stop it.

“Regina, I want t–”

“Shut up Janis.” Regina hisses. Janis knows they should stop, but Regina’s hands are tugging at her belt and Janis feels her resolve melt.

Later, when they’re laying in Regina’s bed, with Regina leaning on Janis’s shoulder and playing with her hair, Janis finds the courage to bring it up.

“Regina?” Janis asks. Regina hums in response. “Do you love me?”

Regina freezes, lets out a sigh and turns away from Janis. “What do you want me to say?”

Janis wants to tell Regina to tell her the truth, but she’s scared of the answer. She wants to tell Regina to lie instead, but she knows lying is never the way to build a relationship. She doesn’t know what she wants, so she doesn’t say anything. She pulls Regina back and kisses her. She kisses her until she’s sure Regina’s forgotten her question.

Janis doesn’t think she sleeps at all that night, too busy watching the rise and fall of Regina’s chest and wondering what’s in store for her when she wakes up. Regina stirs, and Janis pretends to be asleep. She feels Regina shifting around in the bed, but she never hears her get up. Janis stretches and blinks her eyes open. She mentally thanks the acting classes Damian forced her to go to, finally putting their techniques to good use. Regina’s resting on one arm, looking at Janis with a soft fondness in her eyes. Janis reaches up brushes Regina’s hair out her face. Regina smiles, and she leans down to press her lips to Janis’s for a few seconds. Janis closes her eyes and lets herself fall into the feelings of bliss. It ends abruptly, and Janis watches Regina leave the room without a second look.

Janis takes a few minutes to gather her things, thrown haphazardly around the room from last night. She tidies up a bit, knowing Regina hates when things are messy, and pads out of the room to the kitchen for coffee. Regina’s already there, sitting at the table with a mug in her hand. She’s dressed, in her work clothes, and Janis can’t remember seeing her change. There’s already a mug out for Janis, and Janis smiles gratefully at Regina before she takes a sip and sits down across from her.

“I have to go in early today.” Regina says. “Can you lock up when you leave?”

“Yeah, sure.” Janis is startled when Regina slides a key across the table.

“You’ll need this, don’t use to break into my apartment whenever you feel like it.” Regina stands up, taking her mug to the sink.

“Um, yeah okay.” Janis grabs the key and follows Regina. “I can give it back later.”

“Keep it.” Regina says. She spins around, kissing Janis’s cheek quickly before leaving. Janis doesn’t know how long she stands there staring at the door.

Janis feels weird using the key. Her and Regina never really specified what they were. Sure, Janis hasn’t seen anyone since it started, and she knows Regina hasn’t either, but they weren’t official. They didn’t go on dates, they didn’t tell their family or friends about each other, they didn’t text each other throughout the day “just because”. They met up at one of their apartments, put on a movie that they ignored, or cooked dinner that they burned. It was more than just sex, sometimes they didn’t even have sex. They sat, on the couch, or at the table, and just talked. Or they didn’t talk, both doing their own thing, but together nonetheless. Janis hates that she finds Regina’s presence comforting.

Janis goes home later, feeling awkward in Regina’s apartment alone. She locks herself in her art studio all day, working on the paintings she was using for a show in a couple weeks. She was working on them the day before, until Regina texted her, and she left one half done in order to see Regina. She lost herself in the painting, dancing around with her paintbrush, making sure everything was perfect. She doesn’t hear her phone go off the first time, hearing it the second time and grabbing it quickly.

_Can you come over?  
Janis?_

It’s Regina of course. Janis is halfway out of the room before she realizes what she’s doing. She looks back at her painting, almost completed. She contemplates for a moment before she makes her decision.

_In the middle of something rn, I’ll come over when I’m done_

Janis sets her phone down and quickly worked to finish her painting. When she was finished, she decides to shower to get the paint off. She checks her phone again before she leaves, but Regina hasn’t responded. Janis fidgets on her way to Regina’s. She hopes Regina isn’t mad at her. She didn’t leave a mess that morning, and Regina should understand how important her art is to her. Janis knocks on the door and waits a few anxious minutes for Regina to open the door.

“I gave you the key for a reason.” Regina says as soon as she opens the door. “If you’re not going to use it, I’ll take it back.”

“I didn’t want to just walk in. Sorry.” Janis says.

Regina shrugs and lets Janis in. Regina sits on the couch and turns on the TV. Janis sits next to her, but when Janis reaches out to take her hand, Regina pulls it away. Janis sighs. They sit in silence for a few minutes, Janis glancing at Regina every so often. Finally, Janis can’t take it.

“Regina,” Janis says. “What’s up?”

“Nothing.”

“Regina, come on.” Janis shifts over. “Something’s up. Are you mad at me?”

Regina scoffs. “So now you care.”

“What are you talking about?” Janis asks.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about.” Regina stands up and starts pacing. “I ask you to come over today because I want to see you and I’ve had a rough day and you tell me you’re too busy! What could possibly be more important to you?” Janis starts to interrupt but Regina cuts her off. “Your art of course! Because your art is the most important thing and everything else is second, right? Nothing else matters but your art and your shows and your… inspiration!”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Janis says. “I always drop everything for you! Last night I was in the middle of a painting and you texted me and I left it to go see you! God forbid I tell you I can’t just stop in the middle of something because you’re horny! God Regina, if you’re so desperate then do it yourself, you won’t hurt my feelings.” Janis stands up and heads for the door. “I’m leaving, I didn’t come here to fight.”

“No!” Regina grabs Janis’s wrist. “You don’t just get to leave.”

“Why?” Janis jerks her hand out of Regina’s grasp. “You call all the shots, right? I don’t get to make any decisions here, do I?”

“That’s not what we’re arguing about!” Regina says.

“Actually, it is.” Janis steps closer to Regina. “It is because you decide who does what in this. You think you get to decide what’s important to me and what I have to do for you when you don’t do it for me! You wanna tell me I’m the most important thing in your life? You wanna tell me all the times you blew something off to be with me? Or does that shit only matter when it’s me? Regina, you’re such a fucking hypocrite.” Regina clenches her jaw and looks away from Janis. “What? You can’t waste your time defending yourself? Or do you just not have anything to say?”

“Fuck you.” Regina says.

“Whatever Regina, I’m so fucking done with this shit.” Janis storms to the door and this time, Regina lets her. Janis pauses before she leaves. “Regina, do you love me?”

“What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to tell me the truth.” Janis slams the door before Regina can respond.

Janis doesn’t cry until she gets home. When she does, it’s the kind of awful, ugly crying that takes over your whole body until all you can do is just curl up in a ball. She wants to smash that painting, burn it, destroy it until she never remembers it ever again. She lifts it from the easel and holds it above her head and stops. She holds it above her head, waiting for the courage to throw it down and stomp on it. Slowly, she lowers her arms until she places the painting safely on the floor. Her anger has transformed into sadness and she curls up in bed and cries until she falls asleep.

Janis wakes up the next morning feeling more tired than when she fell asleep. She briefly considered calling in sick to work, but she knows she needs the money. She gets ready without really thinking about it, her mind always drawn back to Regina. She doesn’t want to stop seeing Regina. She knows they have their issues and she’s not going to reach out until Regina apologizes. She knows she wasn’t the one in the wrong, she just has to wait for Regina to see that too. She’s sitting on her couch later that day, holding Regina’s key in her hand, staring at it while the TV played some reality show in the back. There’s a knock at the door, and Janis furrows her brow as she stands to answer it. She can’t think of anyone who would be coming over. She hopes it wasn’t her neighbour across the hall, telling Janis his lizard had escaped again.

“Regina?” Janis says after she opens the door. “What are you doing here?”

Regina opens her mouth to say something, then closes it. She looks behind Janis before she opens her mouth again. “You still have my key.”

Janis nods. “Do you want it back?”

Regina doesn’t respond. Janis rolls her eyes and walks back into her apartment, knowing Regina would follow her. She grabs the key and holds it out to Regina. Just as Regina is about to take it, Janis pulls her hand back. Regina falters, her hand held out.

“What if I don’t want to give it back?” Janis says.

Regina shakes her head. She stands up straight. “You said you were done. I assumed you wouldn’t want to keep it.”

“Well that’s the problem with assuming.” Janis steps closer to Regina, smirking. “You make and ass out of you and me.” Regina snorts at Janis’s joke. Janis tilts her head and grins. “What do you say Queen Bee? Wanna watch some TV?”

Regina grabs Janis’s hand and pulls her over to the couch. Regina wraps her arm around Janis’s shoulders as Janis leans against her. Janis knows she shouldn’t be forgiving Regina so easily, at least not until Regina actually apologizes, but Regina’s hands are slipping under her shirt and Janis finds she doesn’t mind if Regina never apologizes.

Janis wakes up the next morning to an empty bed. She’s not surprised, Regina never likes staying in her apartment, claiming it was too small, or too cold, or too far from her work. Janis would be annoyed. It’s not her fault she didn’t grow up with rich parents, but even she has to admit, Regina’s apartment is nicer than hers. Janis walks blearily into the kitchen, blindly grabbing her coffee mug. She pauses when she sees a mug of coffee sitting on the table, with a sticky note attached. Janis picks it up, seeing Regina’s swoopy handwriting.

_I had to go in early today, enjoy the coffee xo_

Janis shakes her head. Regina never stops surprising her.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr @i-own-your-wifi


End file.
